Lift Up Your Head
Joy in the Face of Shame
by
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Jesus did not depend on public opinion to know who he was. In John 5:41--44 he said that he didn’t accept praise from men, as his adversaries did. His identity was not based on what other people said about him. Those who criticized him attached much importance to their mutual affirmation and praise. But Jesus’ authority came from his relationship with his Father, something that they did not have. Dependency on human acceptance makes you susceptible to the effects of shame, because at any moment the acceptance may cease. This is especially important for you if you are having success in what you do, because the envy of others will reduce the public affirmation and may provoke slander and persecution. The reason why Jesus could humble himself so much is made evident in John 13:3--5. The context is the Last Supper with his disciples. Jesus got up, took off his outer clothing, tied on a towel, and started to wash the feet of the disciples. He was doing the job of a low-ranking slave. He was not defending his rank as the leader of the group. The disciples clearly felt that this action was inappropriate for him, but he insisted. In the third verse we can begin to discover the reason he could do this. “Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; so he got up….” Jesus knew who he was. He knew that he had all power, all authority. He knew that he had come from God and was returning to God. He didn’t have to prove anything to anybody, and even less did he have to prove anything to himself. His identity did not depend on being in a position of authority nor acting like an important person, nor on what anyone else would say or think. His capacity for humility was based on being sure of who he was, and sure of his relationship with God, and on knowing the great purpose that had brought him to earth. This knowledge was the perfect defense against shame.
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About the Book
Shame has been called the most unendurable of sentiments. Shame hurts so much that we do everything we can to stop the pain and to keep other people from realizing that we have it. The cover-ups we use end up hurting other people and can be the root cause of marital breakups, workplace conflicts, racial tensions, and church splits. In contrast to guilt, which can lead to repentance and reconciliation, shame leads to isolation and continuing problems.
Everyone feels shame from time to time, but some people live with it constantly. Whether you yourself have felt the pain of shame or whether you would like to reach out to someone who does, you need to find out how to recognize shame and how to apply the solution that God has provided in Christ.
Lift Up Your Head can help you discover what may be happening behind the masks. At the end of each chapter are questions for reflection to help you digest what you have read. The questions can also be used for small-group discussion.
“Carolyn Kerr’s book, Lift Up Your Head: Joy in the Face of Shame is outstanding! It deals with an important and difficult topic which is too often neglected both in the church and in the secular world. Kerr points out how debilitating yet how common shame is. This is an essential work for pastors, therapists, counselors and anyone who has ever been made to feel ashamed.”
—Rev. Dr. Paul Leggett
Pastor, Grace Presbyterian Church, Montrose, New Jersey
About the Author
Carolyn E. Kerr has a doctorate in clinical psychology and a master’s degree in theology. She has been in Christian ministry for thirty-five years in Costa Rica, California, and Spain, and gives conferences in both English and Spanish. She and her husband have three children and eight grandchildren. They live in Valparaiso, Indiana, and Seville, Spain.