A World of Lost Love
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Coming soon... I saw my life without her as an atonement, and I became the believer I was meant to be. I understood that I was hopeless without Him for my meaning, that unless my existence was linked to her eternity as our salvation, I had no meaning. It was what she left for me to know, her honest spirit, like my Grandfather must have been, left by Evelyn, his wife, that became holy, transcending the insidious acceptance of a goiter on her neck for ten years and then dying. Did God owe her nothing for an eternal, loving mind, that was all about believing in HIm?
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About the Book
A few minutes before my wife died, I found myself wishing for time to resolve our two issues, which we hadn’t talked about. Falling in the bathroom and breaking her hip was one. She felt I should have run into the bathroom and saved her. I was not prepared to save her psychologically and didn’t have time.
The other issue was a rape eighteen months before at the city swimming pool in the dressing room. My lady was a young seventy-six years old with Hepatitis C and blind. She had no strength to defend herself from a large and muscular woman, assaulting her because of a failed friendship. I might have hurried to save her from falling, and I did not take her trauma from her with love and through Jesus Christ. I was inhibited and failed her in her fall. I would have no freedom to live on if we hadn’t been saved by Christ by the understanding I carried in my face. I sat down near her and prayed for Jesus Christ to come into my sorrow in my face.
My lady opened her blind eyes and saw my feelings with Christ of sorrow and smiled instantly, twice, with a huge happiness that I’d never seen in her for over forty-five years of marriage. It was a smile of goodness and happiness, that she gave me an image of my wife ten years earlier, when she hadn’t experienced rape. I thank my lady and Jesus for giving us this wonderful ending to her life and the resolution of our conflicts.
About the Author
I have forty-three hours in graduate work and a degree in journalism. I have always studied human behavior. This story is about the end of my wife’s life and how an assault on her at the city pool influenced her death and the last eighteen months of our lives. I live in Lake Havasu City in Arizona and have always loved the desert. I fish and go boating along the Colorado River. My avocation is reading philosophy and psychology.