Facing Fate with Faith

Lesson 1: Fear & Worry

Isaiah 41:10: “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” (NIV) My aunt sent me this verse during my breast cancer treatments in a beautiful card. I kept it in my Bible and referred to it often. It is an example of God’s beautiful promises. When we lean on Him to take care of us, there is no reason to fear.

Listen to Jesus’ words on worry. He tells us many times in the Bible not to be afraid. Here are a few words He says, taken from Matthew 6:25 (KJV): “Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body more than raiment?” I had heard this passage several times before cancer. I could not wrap my head around it and believe it in full. To tell me not to worry was like telling me not to breathe. Until cancer. Then when faced with the realization that I really might not be breathing in the near future, the passages from St. Matthew 6:25-34 and St. Luke 12:22-34 helped me realize what a waste of time worry is. Especially Jesus’s words in verse 27 which point out that worrying does not add time to our lives, and in verse 34 that point out it is best to take one day at a time and not worry about tomorrow. I grabbed onto these verses like life preservers. After a diagnosis of cancer, the whole passage had new meaning for me.

I remember one day about a week after my diagnosis and before I was starting treatment where I just went and sat in my closet to hide and feel despondent. I was caught by my husband, who lovingly scolded me, so it was only a matter of minutes that I spent in the closet. There is no hiding for the mother of an eight-month-old baby. I learned there were more constructive things to do with my time than sitting and worrying.

Then I reread the passage from Jesus in Matthew 6 and his advice on worrying. As I read Jesus’ words, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” (verse 27, NIV), I suddenly heard the humor and irony in his voice and wondered if that was his original tone. I realized that sitting in the closet feeling awful was not adding time to my life, it was only taking it away. To sit and wonder what my son was going to do if I died, or my husband, or if the cancer was spreading, or if I would make it through treatments, or about anything at all -- the time I spent worrying and sitting in fear was just lost time. I had to ask myself, is this how I want to spend the time I do have, wallowing in negative emotions like fear and worry? During cancer treatments, each day certainly does have enough trouble of its own! Troubling side effects, confusing information to process, appointments to go to, being poked at, prodded, tested, lacking the energy to do all that needs to be done, calls to insurance companies to fight over who is paying and how much -- it was all too much!

I realized it was much better to follow Jesus’ advice in verse 34 and take one day at a time. His words set me free from the worry and fear, giving me permission to focus on and enjoy each moment and each day as it comes. I learned it was much healthier to focus on the present and to take one day at a time Will you let His words set you free too?

I encourage you to read Matthew 6:25-34 and the Gospel of Luke in chapter 12 and ask God what He wants you to see and understand from Jesus’ wise words on worry. Both passages from Matthew and Luke emphasize that our Heavenly Father knows what we need and He will provide it. This is a comforting realization that God is taking care of us. In the midst of our difficulties, He is there looking out for us. He is with us. We need not worry. We can trust Him. At times we may feel like He is not there, but He is.

When you get rid of fear and worry, like with all bad habits, you will have extra time so replace it with something positive. What could be more positive than praising our Lord? I challenge you to replace fear and worry with praise. Try humming or singing a song. One of my favorite passages that has helped me get through difficult times even before cancer, is from Philippians 4:8 (NLT) “And now, dear brothers and sisters, let me say one more thing as I close this letter. Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”

So don’t think about the cancer. Think about the beautiful smile on your child’s face. Think about him learning to walk. Think about the beautiful morning sunlight dancing off of the grass and dew. Think about how many people love you and are providing help. Think about having the strength to go for a walk today, even though it was shorter than you used to take. Think about who came over and did your laundry so you could rest. Think about the kind people who bring dinner over once a week. Think about your friends’ lives and the positive things happening for them. Think about babies yet to be born. Think about how well you handled a chemotherapy treatment. Think about how you can constructively use the time during your treatments, i.e., by taking knitting, scrapbooking, sewing, writing, reading, listening to music. Think about what brings joy into your life and start doing it - watch humorous shows. Plant a seed and watch it grow. If you play a musical instrument, continue to do so. And PRAISE GOD FOR ALL OF IT.

Worry’s partner is fear and fear is definitely an active emotion for us as cancer patients. Fear of the unknown, fear of the treatments, fear of side effects, fear of the future and all the other garbage that goes with cancer. When we have thoughts of fear and anxiousness, it is important to recognize them and then deal with them constructively. Be ready to know where to take them. God is before us and beside us and we can take those fears to Him, knowing he will never leave us or forsake us. The Lord is near and ready to listen. Philippians chapter 4, verses 5-7 reassures us of this. Fear does not do good things for us or for others. Try to avoid it by asking God to fill you with His love, and His peace that surpasses our understanding. When times are bleak and discouraging, we can rely on God’s promises. He is there to lift us up every day in the midst of our despair.