The Myth of Peer Pressure

FOREWORD

After several conversations with our youth, I am convinced they are more intelligent than previous generations. However, many have received little or no positive guidance from the adults in their life. Guidance requires much more than words, it needs all of the attention of the person giving it.

Our children are full of questions and confusion, with no one that has shown them they care or respect them enough to answer them. They have been forced to become wiser in their own minds, because of the treatment (or lack of attention) they receive from we who are supposed to be nurturing and protecting them from all the deceit Satan has set before them. Their position of priority in the lives of the primary adult in their life has been replaced by the desire to have more, i.e. money, prestige, position on the job, sex/companionship or to support a drug habit.

At times when they should be going to father or mother for help, they are forced to make decisions on their own, or after receiving the counsel of peers who lack the experience of life to give it. Even the person with the highest IQ will have problems making wise productive, positive decisions without experience and proper input.

Man cannot get past the wisdom of God. It takes two, a male and female to properly raise a child. That’s the way we were designed. Prayerfully, they will be a godly twosome. Single parenting is a hard task and cannot help but reflect in the child’s life.

CHAPTER ONE

PEERS SHOULD PRESSURE POSITIVELY

I know that it is popular today to blame peer pressure for the things that we do wrong. I smoked it because everybody else did, all of my friends are wearing them, everybody else was drinking alcohol there, if I said no, they would laugh, tease and call me a square. They, everybody, friends and them make up what we call peers.

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Our peers are those people around us who for some reason we allow to influence and pressure us into doing or being a part of things that we would normally have nothing to do with, just so we can be a part of them or be considered cool to be with. Now let’s look up the words peer, pressure and influence.

PEER: A person who has equal standing with another as in status, class, or age.

PRESSURE: A constraining influence on the will or mind as a moral force

INFLUENCE: A power indirectly or intangibly affecting a person or event; Power to sway or effect, based on prestige, wealth, ability, or status.

Let's look at whom we are referring to in the phrases everybody else they asked me, and all my friends. Who are these people and what are they doing for you in your life? Ask yourself what are the things that I need to sustain my life and fulfill my dreams? Hint: Food, shelter, clothing, education and health care, things of this nature.

Now ask yourself how many of your peers, friends or people you hang around with provide you with these things. Everybody, they and my friends are not supplying life sustaining needs. Why allow them to have a say in what you do with your life? Now go back and read the meanings of the words peer, pressure and influence. Who can have that kind of power over you?

If you allow anyone to have that kind of power over you, surely it has to be someone who at the very least provides some of the things you need to sustain life. Do you have a vision of how you plan your life to be in five or ten years? Does your vision include having a baby before you’re ready? Is doing drugs or drinking alcohol going to help your vision to become a reality?

Is skipping class or hanging out in the streets going to improve your chances of achieving your dream? Is disobeying your parents helping to produce the type of family you want? Is not paying attention to your teacher or being disrespectful helping you to get out of high school with a diploma, will it prepare you for college?

Why are you allowing people who have no bearing on your present or future well being to influence your decisions? I am not saying they are not your friends; I am saying they should have no control over you.

Many believe that at a certain age we begin to have a need for a social change. We begin to spend more time with our peers and less time with our family. When we go out to have fun it is usually with a non-family member. We basically create a new or 2nd family. This is not a bad thing. It is good to have a healthy circle of friends. The myth is that this group of people can rob you of your free will to make separate choices.