We started talking about what had been going on in our lives, as it had been almost two months since we last saw him. I shared with him how we have been encouraged to write our story and were in the process of doing so. I told him I’d love to arrange a lunch or dinner get together with him, his assistant, and their spouses. I continued by telling him I’d love to get their perspective and their feelings about all the events that had occurred in order to better authenticate this writing. Neither my wife, nor I, was prepared for what happened next. His countenance totally changed, as though he was accessing a part of his brain he really had not intended to revisit that day or maybe a place which held a very prominent and special place in his memory. I am sure glad he did.
First of all, you must understand and visualize a few things about this man. He just turned 50 years old. He stands about six feet and three or four inches tall. He is built like a professional linebacker, with broad shoulders and sturdy frame. His voice is steady, deep, and confident. Immediately after I was diagnosed, I was warned by a friend whose relative was a patient of his, “He wears cowboy boots”! My response was, this is exactly the kind of man I want working on me! Without apology I can declare I am a bit biased to the down home, common sense, country types. I assure you, as I look back there are no doubts he was exactly the right man for this job. He was the man whom God had chosen as my angel and agent of healing.
The experience he shared with us that day left me totally overwhelmed. And although it is not my intention to disclose every part of the conversation which came next as we sat there in his office yesterday. I do want to share what I walked away with, it was a huge blessing. I will share with you the revelations that came to me as I sat there listening to him as he recalled his thought process and his reactions on the day, he said, “I died!”
I was moved and blessed in a way I am not sure can be adequately explained, seeing this man, as he choked back his tears, talking about this special day that had left him in total awe. He described his feelings, his actions, his desperation, and then his amazement with each part of the event. But even beyond that, the long term impact it has had on his relationships with his family and those he loves, as well as his perspectives as a physician.
“As I stood in your room that day and observed as the team was performing the code I concluded you were a dead man, and I was going to have to go tell your family. As I approached the waiting room, where they were gathered, I was unable to make myself walk through the door. There was so much grief in the room I could not go in. So, I walked on past the door and went and stood in the stairwell. As I stood there arguing with God (my interpretation of his words) all of the sudden I felt warmth from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. I knew it was going to be OK. I turned and walked back past the waiting room and into your room. At this point, I observed the monitor to see as your heart-beat returned.”
Needless to say, when he had finished speaking I was an emotional basket case for the rest of the day. I went in and out of frequent lapses into tears, I could not contain them. I kept seeing him as he shared his heart with tears and all I could think of was wow, how great is a God who can arrange and orchestrate events in such a way as to meet the needs in the lives of so many, and simultaneously. Before today I was seeing this thing in a really selfish, “What was God doing for, or telling me?” perspective. It was a huge blessing for Bev and I when Dr. Portera agreed to do the “Foreword” for this work. I do feel God had a special purpose for his family and mine, beyond physical healing, when he brought us together for His display of divine power.
I had never stopped to think about the fact that I was not the only target of God’s affection that day. His plans went far beyond me. It totally changed my thought process as I tried to recollect events and make plans to complete this work. I think the greatest challenge I now have is to get a better understanding of what God did, and was doing, in everyone else’s life. More so, how did He use this event to impact my angels and my friends. The third miracle here is really not about me, as much as it is about them. I may never know the extent, in which He used my situation to speak to the many hearts He touched that day, but I certainly want to try. I have visited many of them and learned many things I never knew. In fact, it seems every time I talk to someone, I get a new perspective. It is so exciting to hear!