Introduction
Marriage! I have dreamed about it since I was a little girl. The thought of being loved by someone unconditionally for the rest of my life and living happily ever after left me in a dream world. As a young girl I watched all the movies with fairy tale endings Cinderella, The Little Mermaid, Snow White all beautiful love stories about a girl who gets to spend the rest of her life with her prince charming. Little girls all across the world are told to cherish love and to anticipate the day we will be married. We were told to learn how to be domestic by cooking and cleaning. We were told to be prepared to have babies and settle down. We were told to depend on the man to be a provider and take care of the bills while we take care of the house. Then the world changed.
Women took to the workforce and naturally the landscape of the home began to change. Young girls were encouraged to go to school and get education so that they could grow up and take care of themselves. Be independent is what they told us. Women began to tear down walls in the workplace fighting for equal pay and an opportunity to be successful in a career outside the home. The more equal we became the less dependent we found ourselves. The dream changed from wanting a husband and a family to take care of, to wanting a career and the ability to be self-sufficient. In all that change, however, one fact still remains many women, even the successful ones, want prince charming and happily ever after.
There is just one problem, somewhere along the line the culture of female independence has muddied the waters and made it difficult for “independent” women to have successful, lasting relationships. As a graduate of Drexel University with a very successful career in project management who has for many years embraced female independence I truly understand the woes of the independent mindset and dating. It was not until I changed my mindset and began to operate differently that God allowed me to meet my “prince charming” or whom I call my Boaz and am now married and living my happily ever after.
How did I reach this place you may ask? Honestly it was a long hard road with some difficult pills to swallow along the way. I came to some realizations that I didn’t particularly care for but in being a believer and wanting to follow God’s plan for my life had to allow my mind to be transformed by his word. Though it was difficult, it was worth it.
That said, this book is meant to share with you all that I learned in transitioning my mindset to become an independent dependent and recognizing I was married before marriage. Had it not been for the love of the risen king Jesus Christ and learning who he called me to be I would still be in the cycle of meaningless relationships. This book will be thought provoking and will challenge the cultural norms but I am confident that as you read and pray, the Holy Spirit will enlighten you. When reading be prayerful asking God what he wants to show you about you and what he wants you to change. Use the questions at the end of each chapter to guide your transformation. While a short book don’t treat it as a quick read but rather as a guide to receiving what God has for you.