Broken but Healed

It was the month of December, where my lovely parents thought that it was fit to give birth to such a strong individual. Hello, my name is Emmanuelle, and I have a disability called Cerebral Palsy. Cerebral Palsy is an condition that is marked by impaired muscle coordination. This is caused by damage to the brain before or at birth. Cerebral Palsy caused me so much pain,in my younger years, not only was I discouraged because my mother died at birth but I was also discouraged because of my disability. Making me feel different. At the very age of five, I knew that I was different in many ways than others. I always felt like the outcast of my environment, within my family and friends within school and church everywhere I turned, in my eyes it would be defeat after defeat. I never felt loved, even if someone would tell me that they loved me, I wouldn't believe it. As time went by, I really missed my mother although I didn't know her, but I was always told about her, and her characteristics. At the age of eight old, while riding on the yellow bus back from a very tiring day at school, I was sitting next to my boyfriend at the time. Yes, I know!  Wait you have a boyfriend at the age of eight years old? I sure did, as the bus driver dropped all my classmates and peers off at their destination. I whispered in Derek's ears, do you love me?  If you do, show me, that's when it started to all happen. Derek started to kiss me on my neck. His hands went down and started touching me in inappropriate places. I knew it was wrong to do, but, it felt right at the time so I persisted and let him do whatever he wanted to do to me. Because I thought that was love. Unfortunately, I was wrong.