CAREGIVING WITH GOD

My life was planned. After many moves around the country for Jerry’s job, I was finally in a career in which I thrived: technology integration specialist for the school district in Minnesota, where I was employed as a teacher. Then Jerry’s erosive osteoarthritis was so severe that a move to a warmer climate was needed. I completed my doctorate degree as we were moving back to Oklahoma City. The move was also to be closer to our oldest daughter. I got busy searching for an encore career to use my fresh degree, and I got involved in our new church and community, but then Jerry couldn’t wake up.

Mark 5:19 tells the story when Jesus talked to a man just freed from a terrible demon. The man wanted to follow along with Jesus. However, Jesus’s response to the man was, “Go home to your own people and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you.”

The reason for writing this book on my experiences taking care of my husband, Jerry, is just such a testimony. God wants us to tell others how wonderful He is when He rewrites your story! We have plenty of other scriptures encouraging us to do that as well.

I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. (Psalm 9:1)

Come and hear, all you who fear God; let me tell you what he has done for me. (Psalm 66:16)

One generation commends your works to another; they tell of your mighty acts. They speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty—and I will meditate on your wonderful works. They tell of the power of your awesome works—and I will proclaim your great deeds. (Psalm 145:4–6)

Other scriptures also telling us to proclaim God’s good works include Psalm 26:6–7, Psalm 73:28, Psalm 73:28, Psalm 75:1, Psalm 105:2, and Psalm 107:2.

Do I need any more reason than that to write this book? Psalm 145:4–6 emphasizes that not only do we need to tell our stories to those adults around us, but it is also crucial to pass them on to younger generations. How else will they know God’s care for us? We tell our children and grandchildren about our accomplishments in life, our careers, and our hobbies and interests, but how often do we tell them of God’s care for us when He rewrites our stories?

This book aims to do just that: tell of God’s mighty deeds in my life as I cared for my husband of over fifty years at his death. God did not stop the struggles and affliction. He did not take away the delusions and loss of memory. He did not keep us from the ten inpatient hospital stays. He did not give Jerry total recovery. But He did draw me closer to Him every day of our twenty-two months together, and He gave us a beautiful and special relationship. This book cannot be long enough to tell all the magnificent things He did for me. My prayer is it will be uplifting to you no matter what struggles you have faced, are currently facing, or will face.

Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:6)

When I read this, it hit home personally. Throughout my life, I have felt God directing me in many ways. During the caregiving days, He gave me even more direction. I know we will not be complete until Christ’s return, however God is continuing to work a good work in me leading to that day. The caregiving led me to the next chapter of the good work God had planned for me.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. (2 Corinthians 1:3–4)

In this verse is one of the best reasons I believe God put me in this position of caregiving. He knows there are others in the same position or going through some other difficult time. This scripture lets me know I now have a responsibility and opportunity to comfort others. But it is not my comfort. I am to share the comfort of God. Every day I was able to take care of Jerry was a credit to God’s strength. Every day I got up depressed but ended up praising God at the close of the day was a credit to God’s presence. Every day I had enough wisdom to make the right decisions was a credit to my Bible study and prayer. Every day I responded to Jerry with love and patience was a credit to God’s answer to my daily prayers. The twenty-two months were all credited to God never leaving my side. Our daughter Kara said as part of her talk at Jerry’s celebration of life service, “As hard as the stroke was on everyone, especially Mom and Dad, it allowed us the chance to see the sweetest finale of a great man’s life.”

The following verse gave me a different future hope.

I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten. (Joel 2:25)

God was telling the people He would repay their years of tribulation. I knew God would repay my twenty-two months of caregiving with a fulfilling ministry of sharing my testimony with others who needed to hear of God’s amazing care of His children. I pray this book will do that for you.

God may choose to rewrite your story as well!