The Broken House
A Story of Home Renovation, Remodeling, and Restoration
by
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Preface
During the process of selling our remodeled house, many prospective buyers came to see it. Providentially, while we were still home, a couple of them arrived requesting a tour. We didn’t realize at the time that our accidental meeting was with New York Times Best-Selling Authors. But after touring the house and hearing our story, these Authors encouraged us to write this book. They saw in our story the same beauty and spirit that they said they’d felt in our home. And as they left, we realized that The Broken House was more than just a home renovation project.
Instead of being filled with courage and excitement about sharing our story with the world, it’s a humbling journey for us to be publicly transparent about our emotional weaknesses. The purpose of this story of healing and forgiveness is to support others who are stumbling where we fell. And sometimes when grieving it helps to know that others have been through a similar journey. Our only consolation in this daring feat is the hope that someone will benefit from our mistakes, and avoid the devastation that selfishness wreaks on all kinds of human relationships.
Home renovation has become one of the most publicized profitable endeavors. Yet few realize the emotional stress and tiring work that goes on behind the scenes, and what it truly takes to make something that is seemingly worthless markedly increased in value. Surviving a doomed marriage is a lot like tearing out drywall, busting old tile, and replacing broken glass. But please note, there are many house flippers much more successful than we have been, and likewise, there are marriages that have withstood much more, and come out much better than we are now.
The goal of our message is not to imply that we have the best marriage in the world. We humbly acknowledge we’ve made grave mistakes and from them learned difficult lessons. Our story is an attempt to rescue grace and forgiveness from the rubble of current society. And we suggest that before conflicts are resolved in our world, we must attempt to make peace in our homes.
In our line of work, we have witnessed various degrees of violence, abuse, and threatening behaviors. We do not advocate anyone expose themselves to a dangerous marital situation. The Bible tells a story of a demoniac that was bound in chains and separated from his family for safety (Mark 5:1-5). And yet, while separation can be used for damage control, it can also be a time for rehabilitation.
While it may not happen for everyone, we’ve seen extreme violence turn to tranquility, manipulation become humility, and abuse reform to kindness. It’s one thing to help other people overcome their own individual challenges. But the concept of reform takes on a new meaning when it’s experienced personally.
We’ve become messengers of hope and love, and of faith in the impossible. We come to you as eyewitnesses, sharing the good news about what we have seen. Something completely dead, was miraculously brought back to life. And we refuse keep this wonderful reality to ourselves anymore.
Resurrection is not just an old tale in the Bible we sometimes read during Easter. It’s not entertainment, fiction, or even a wonderful bedtime story. It’s a modern-day reality that we’ve experienced for ourselves, and it’s offered to all who can endure the process of restoration.
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About the Book
How does a psychiatrist cope with trauma when a failed marriage results in severe depression and anxiety?
It’s not often that the emotional experience of mental health professionals, who—like their patients—are fighting to find answers for their own healing and wholeness, can be explored. It can be hard to accept that sometimes even therapists, need therapy.
This book explores what it’s like to have the tools to build a stable structure, but all that still develops is a broken house. After counseling college students and treating thousands of patients in psychiatry, the authors (a husband-and-wife team) found that their marital counseling ministry was more successful when empathetic transparency about their own mistakes and failures was given.
Instead of using hammers, drills, screws, and nails, this couple had to learn to use techniques that tear down walls and expose the true condition of a damaged relationship.
Embark on a journey with the “Chip and Joanna of marital counseling” as they reveal how a dilapidated house in foreclosure helped them start the renovation process on a marriage that was broken, and in disrepair.
If you’re in a relationship that feels hopeless and are wondering if a seemingly bad investment has any real value, you’ll discover valuable lessons in this amazing story.
About the Author
Burgess Mitchell retired from Vanderbilt University as assistant dean of engineering in 2021. After thirty years in higher education, he decided to invest in his own two sons. He co-partners raising them with his wife, DR. LINDSAY EVANS-MITCHELL, who is a board-certified adult psychiatrist. Together they have embarked upon a restoration journey for their family and have a passion for ministering to families struggling with behavioral health issues that prevent them from living abundant lives.