In Highs & Lows

Another instance of sexual abuse happened when I was 7 years old. It was only a one-time event, but he was a neighbor so I would see him all the time. I remember taking a shower afterwards and feeling so dirty. I was sure that my mom would know what happened and be mad at me. Of course she had no idea what had occurred. That was a terrifying ordeal that affected my entire life. I did not share this with anyone until I was in high school, when I shared with a beloved teacher because I was afraid I was pregnant as a result. My mom did not explain the facts of life so that I would understand that this was not possible. I know that there’s a school of thought that our brains develop neural pathways for the propensity of mental illness because of trauma in our lives. I know for sure the fear that I experienced throughout my childhood and adolescence stemmed from those instances. Also the involvement with spiritism opens doors to the demonic world to influence our lives. I believe that both led to my later struggles with anxiety, panic, and agoraphobia. Despite the obvious communist indoctrination, I loved going to school. It was confusing to me when they talked badly about God. One day the teacher asked us, “Close your eyes and ask God for a piece of candy.” Of course we did so. Then she had us open our eyes, and of course there was no candy there. Then she said, “Please close your eyes and ask Fidel Castro for a piece of candy.” Then she would place a piece of candy on each of our desks. She had us open our eyes. Then she exclaimed, “See, when you need something don’t ask God; He is not there. Fidel will always provide.” This is just one example of the extent of their indoctrination.