WouldWork

Introduction I hope that this book has grabbed your attention because you are looking for something that will provide you, a man of God, with some guidance on how to live out your marriage. Or maybe you’re looking because everything is good, but you are focusing more on getting things in line with what God says. I have good news, in either case I think this book will answer the call. But I am hoping this book will reach much deeper, grabbing the attention of every man of God, including those planning to get married at some point in the future, the divorcée, and even the widower. Men, regardless of your current marital status, I believe this book is that “something” we all need before, during, and even after a marriage. I created the following two short, bulleted lists in hopes that they will paint a quick and honest picture of what you should and should not expect from Wouldwork: The Carpenter's Marriage Blueprint (for the Man of God). What you should expect. - This book is for men: single, engaged, married, divorced, or widowed. - This book facilitates a deeper walk with God as it relates to marriage. - This book helps men understand God’s requirements as married men. - This book methodically steps through the Scriptures and is easy to follow. - This book is written for all levels of believers. - This book is based on the word of God. - This book is counterintuitive because it is based on many of God’s principles. - This book will challenge men wherever they are in their walk with God. Now, what you should not expect. - This book is not “self-help”. - This book is not unreasonable, impractical, or theoretical. - This book is not academic, but a conversation amongst brothers. - This book is not entirely subjective. - This book is not easy to swallow. - This book is not a how-to guide for “saving” a marriage. - This book will not help you make your wife “feel” loved. - This book will not point the finger of blame at anyone. - This book will not directly address fatherhood or family issues. A note for the Bible scholars: I make it my purpose to read the Bible exegetically. Admittedly though, I do take some liberties where/when a different way of looking at things may be beneficial, provided that "different way" does not impact my walk with God. For example, we can all agree that there is not a lot of information available to us with regard to creation and the fall. I do sometimes attempt to read between the lines of Genesis chapters 1 – 3 but not to the point where I purposefully or knowingly undermine his word, his wisdom, or negatively impact my walk with Him. Teaching and counseling others are huge responsibilities, and both are very important to God. Consequently, I do not take either lightly. When I take any liberties in this book, I will clearly communicate something to the effect that the statement is my belief, my thought, or my opinion. I want to be clear what is scripture and what is not. Much like the clarifications Paul makes that we will look at later in this book. That way, if I am wrong everyone need only think, “Ah, this guy’s perspective may be a little different than mine (or what I am used to hearing) but there isn’t anything heretical, alarming, or even concerning.” Onto another very important matter. This book does not attempt to dive too deeply into the human psyche. This author is well aware of the fact that emotions like anger, resentment, and hurt are serious problems in not only marriage but other types of relationships as well. I am aware of and acknowledge the fact that our feelings, our perceptions, and the things behind why we do the things we do are very real. If the reader is not aware of any strongholds in their life, there is a good chance that through revelation by the Spirit, this book, and self-examination, they may meet up with them face-to-face. The Holy Spirit can use the contents of this book to reveal those deeper issues. I am sure that has the potential to be scary for some, but confrontation with strongholds is an essential part of healing and correction. My advice, meet those strongholds head on and prayerfully deal with them. To those I remind, God has not given you a spirit of fear but one of power and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7). The spirit of love will also accompany you through this journey. However, as it relates to this book, uncovering and addressing those deeper issues is well beyond its scope. The great thing about all of this is that God’s scope is without bound. He sees all, knows all, and can handle everything brought before him. In our weakness(es) he shows up strong! (2 Corinthians 12:9) There is hope! Along that same vein, some Christians have strong opinions about believers using any resource other than God (through prayer and faith) for mental and emotional healing. For whatever it’s worth, I respectfully but strongly disagree. I do not believe prayer is the only option, but as with everything, prayer should always be first and it should be continual. I believe it is perfectly fine to talk with one or more mental health professionals whenever the need arises. Seeking help is not indicative of a lack of faith or trust in God. God has people everywhere to help his people anywhere. All throughout the Bible we see God healing people through other people. Why would anyone believe that stopped? That is how God seems to do a lot of what he does, through people. That is not only through the physical laying on of hands but also includes intercessory prayer.